We all know that life’s not fair; that bad things happen to good people and that sometimes the wicked prosper.
There are some people whose lives are an endless string of tragedies such that you wonder what they could have possibly done to deserve such torment and you actually marvel at the fact that they haven’t committed suicide yet?
So life’s not fair but then neither is God.
And this article is to chronicle just how unfair God can be.
God is so unfair that no matter how many times you mess up, He’ll still give you the benefit of the doubt.
And you can imagine how annoying that is if you’ve spent your life doing everything ‘by the book’ and you’ve really made sacrifices to be a goody-two-shoes only to find God loves the drunken, prostituting and foul-mouthed malefactor just as much!
Not only that, but God has a tendency of showing clear bias towards sinners, He actually seeks them out while the saintly piously turn their condescending noses up at those they deem to be morally inferior.
Well if you’re one of those people who lead their lives acting like there’s an imaginary halo surrounding your head; being so spiritual that you’re of no earthly use – the joke’s on you!
People are not perfect it’s true but to be more specific about it – you are not perfect.
Doing an inventory recently of all the people who’ve hurt me without provocation; been cruel to me without justification and those who’ve hated me without cause, I felt I had a right to marinate in some self-pity and harbor some bitterness.
Why had all these unfair things happened to me?
What had I done to deserve them?
I mean if you’ve ever come to that point where you wonder why someone would just maliciously stab you in the back for no apparent reason, you will understand what I’m talking about.
In the midst of all this gloomy musing I remembered one of my friend’s grandmothers who used to always ask when you lamented about a misfortune, “Who did you want it to happen to?”
My take on life is that it is not fair.
That sometimes you’ll do all the right things but still end up with bad results.
That sometimes you’ll follow all the laid down rules and still end up being used, abused and taken for granted.
That sometimes you’ll love someone and give them every inch of you and in return they’ll make promises that never materialize.
Life’s not fair.
We have every reason to grumble, murmur, complain and throw a bitch fit but none of us – not even one of us – has a right to do so.
If God was to be fair, many of us would have been destroyed ions ago.
If God was fair many of us would have had one chance at making our lives better and if we blew it – we’d have no means of redeeming ourselves.
One of the things I am grateful for is that I have had the good fortune of being afforded second chances and also the providence of recognizing each one as an opportunity to finally get right the things I’ve gotten wrong.
God doesn’t discriminate and most times He doesn’t give favors like freesbies but the thing that makes Him unfair is that He shows mercy.
His mercy is unfair.
It is unfair because it allows us to sometimes get away with our blunders, to go on unscathed by our past choices and at times to thrive even when we deserve to perish.
So that all the people we’ve hurt, harmed, disappointed and inflicted suffering on can then exclaim how unfair life is because they see you thrive even when they don’t believe you deserve to because of what you have done to them.
And yes, the truth is we have done things unto others that we do not wish to have done unto us – we’re not perfect.
I realized a while ago that if my life was a story of first chances; I’d have been a complete failure and existing in abject misery.
Because I don’t remember any first chance at doing something that I didn’t blow or mess up.
In many things (especially the important stuff) I have had to try it again before I could succeed; in short my life is a story of second chances.
But the thing with second chances is that sometimes the catastrophe you create when you fail the first time around cannot be mended no matter how many chances you’re given to ‘fix’ your mess because some things have consequences that last forever.
We must all live with our mistakes but we should also live with the lessons they’ve taught us otherwise we’ll never transcend the past or triumph in the present or hope in the future.
God’s in unfair because He’ll be willing to let you try again even when other people think you don’t deserve it in as much as you don’t think those who’ve hurt you deserve any mercy.
I used to tell one of my friends that sometimes life is spent dodging the bullets of misfortune.
I said we have no way of knowing why one tragedy strikes a specific person and spares another except to assume that it was that person’s fate to encounter such catastrophe.
If you’ve ever watched someone get hurt by something you yourself desired to have or do – you feel relieved, you feel lucky and that you’ve been spared.
You feel like you’ve dodged a bullet.
But there are times no matter how fast you run, or where you hide; no matter how well you live your life; no matter how good the choices you make or how you stick to the right rules – misfortune will come your way.
Even when you don’t deserve it – it’s going to happen one way or the other some bullet is just going to hit you.
Because dear reader, there are some bullets that just have your name written on them.
And when those bullets hit you and miss everyone else near you by a hair’s breadth as they sigh in relief because the bullet missed them – you’re going to be bitter thinking how life’s unfair.
Don’t be, just be glad that God is unfair too and that somehow along life’s winding journey when you least deserve it – God’s going to show you mercy.
And whatever your heart break may be today; I think you deserve to know that it will be alright in the end – God’s unfairness will see to it.
Parting shot: I was in the middle of explaining to myself why I have a right to be bitter about all the bad things other people have done to me and all the pain that has been unfairly inflicted on me and then I remembered all the things I’ve been blessed with that I didn’t earn; all the second chances that I didn’t deserve and all the wrongs that I have been forgiven. I was ashamed that I had even tried to make a comparison. Life’s not fair. True. But neither is God – that’s why He cares about even the most unworthy – Delta Milayo Ndou
On a totally unrelated note, I would like to invite you all to pay a visit to a fantastic writer who just started blogging about Thinking out loud – she’s a treat and then some!