May you find what you seek

I learned to love you from afar. To watch your retreating back without shedding a tear. I learned to long for you from a distance, repressing the urge to chase madly after you.

Loving you made me weak before it could make me strong… it hurt me before it could heal me…and it broke me before it could make me whole.'s been real!

…it’s been real!

I learned to love you without expectation – taking only what you were willing to give and offering only what you were willing to accept.

I have loved you in a language of goodbyes, through seasons of absence and the constant shadows of one farewell after another.

I have loved you defiantly – across vast spaces and time zones. I have loved you despite the wrongness of what felt right.

I have loved you through months of yawning silences and through sleep-deprived nights of Skype-calls…

I have loved you too long and too hard. I have loved you without making the effort to do so… and without you having to put in any hours to earn it.

But you are chained to the wind and where the wind goes – you will follow. I am chained to my dreams – and where they drive me I will go.

We are but two ships passing each other on the vast ocean of life… may you find a safe harbor in stormy seas and perchance we may sail on the same waters again.

But for now – farewell my love. As you would put it, “it’s been real”.

And as I would put it, “may you find what you seek”.


13 thoughts on “May you find what you seek

  1. Mqhe says:

    With your permission, I need to forward this letter to someone. I know they ought to hear this…

  2. inzwaimerit says:

    Wow, you have a way of expressing yourself that is so profound. Those feelings, thoughts and questions are so real. Any woman who has loved and let go can identify. Thanks for speaking for some of us whose writing is still struggling

  3. Sharon says:

    Such a sad heartbreaking piece Del, but written by someone who has accepted that what is will be.

  4. bloggomobi says:

    My Mind is official blown away!

  5. ewurabasempe says:

    just received this as a forward, wow! u said it for me. I hope it’s ok to reblog and pass along, ive also clicked follow! see u around!

  6. ewurabasempe says:

    Reblogged this on Musings of An African Woman and commented:
    expressing something I’ve yearned to articulate for years…

  7. Bittersweet memories
    That’s all I have and all I’m taking with me

  8. Shirley says:

    How did i miss this piece wow, thank you.

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